All you writers out there had to know that I have a cat. I think it is a prerequisite; writer = cat. So, yes I have a cat. She is eleven years old but still acts like she's a two year old kitten. One of her favorite things to do is run up the stairs like a maniac, meow incessantly at the top of the stairs, and then tear down the stairs ending up where ever I happen to be.
Most of the day she spends sleeping in my closet When she's not sleeping you can find her in my lap so that it is impossible for me to use my laptop. She loves to lay across my right arm, rendering it immobile. When I nudge her to move she gets all huffy with me and tears off down the hallway.
The fun begins when it's time for me to turn off the TV, shut down my laptop, and head off to bed. Simple enough, right? Sure. No problem. I get my water and start my ascent to my bedroom. Typically, my cat is sleeping on the couch when I head to bed because she is waiting. Waiting for that perfect moment. The cat owners out there know the moment of which I speak. It's the moment when you have the blankets perfect, you're snug as a bug in a rug underneath them, and you have just begun to doze off into dreamland when "Meooooowwww. Meeeooowww." My cat is at the top of the stairs staring at me and crying. Why? I have no idea. All I know is it is the most annoying thing ever. This goes on for five minutes. In the meantime I am trying to get her to come to bed. Calling her name, using the sound I make to get her to come to me, but nothing works. She just sits there and cries at me. Finally, she runs and makes an acrobatic leap onto the bed. But the fun doesn't stop there.
Now we have entered what I like to call 'The Patrolling of the Bed.' I'm awake now and flipping through the channels trying to find something decent to watch at eleven o'clock at night while my cat steps on me, purposefully blocking my view, and doesn't move an inch. I gently nudge her off and she walks up the side of me, onto my pillow causing my head to dip, and back down the other side of me. Then she steps on me again and thus creating the vicious cycle of her patrolling. This goes on for a few patrols before she decides to sleep at my side. Then the licking begins. She licks my neck, my cheek, anything she can reach. Her rough tongue hurts but after eleven years I am used to it. She will lick for a good five minutes before I tell her to stop, I swear I should buy her a salt lick, and then I can get some rest.
So, while I go to bed around 10:30 the truth is I don't get to sleep until a quarter after eleven because of my crazy cat.